Michele Benza

With skyrocketing plane fares added to the new trend in charging fees for checked luggage, it makes good sense to pack all your travel gear in a carry-on.  It not only saves time, but also ensures that you and your luggage arrive in the same city at the same time and, best of all, it gives you peace of mind! 

by Michele Benza
San Francisco Image Consultant

Since I am an inveterate traveler, both for business and pleasure, I have learned through trial and error the art of maximizing a minimized wardrobe.    Being an organized packer is key.  Once you have that down pat, you can pack your bag and be up and away like a free spirit.

Here’s the packing formula that works like a charm for me:

Clothes: Count the number of days you will be away from home, divide the total by three to get the number of tops you will need.  Then, divide the total days again by four for the number of bottom halves–including pants and skirts.  Just for fun, toss in an extra top.  I refuse to do laundry while on vacation, so I pack 12 pairs of panties (plus an extra one just in case…) and six bras.  That’s it!

The next important element is that your traveling wardrobe should be based on two colors. I like black and white as it makes it much easier to accessorize.  I usually throw in a third color like a red top and skirt to add a bit of dash and dare, but 90% of the wardrobe is black and white,

Outerwear: choose a water resistant hooded shell that you can scrunch into your handbag to keep you warm during the flight, as planes can be chilly.

Bags: select one large handbag with a shoulder strap, preferably lightweight and not fragile. Inside the bag place a small leather purse with a wrist strap (see picture below  by Juicy Couture) with all your personal items such as your passport, cash, credit cards, driver’s license, lipstick and mirror. Not only will this help you find your personal items in a flash, but it also can be your back-up purse and serve you well for an elegant dinner or show.

Carry-on suitcase:  I personally have a preference for bags versus suitcases like this one made by BRICS.

Shoes:  Wear one pair of comfortable but elegant walking shoes on the plane and pack an extra pair of flats and a pair of heels if you intend to party.

Jewelry: Keep it to a minimum. Take only the pieces you love and wear all the time. Add a couple of fabulous earrings. Et voila!

Toiletries:  As you well know, all liquids, gels and creams must be carried in three-ounce containers. Not a problem if you know that three ounces of toner and makeup remover are enough for 12 days of a daily skin care regimen! (So no excuses!) The same amount is needed for multi-purpose contact lens solution. As for moisturizers, eye cream, and serum, you will need about one ounce of each. Place makeup in a separate Ziploc bag.

Stuff shoes with socks and underwear, place each shoe in a plastic bag and pack the shoes in the corners of your carry-on. This way the weight will be balanced and the corners of the bag re-enforced.  Place heavier clothes at the bottom of the bag. It is very important to button all tops and fold your clothing perfectly.  That way they will be ‘pressed’ by the weight on top of them and, if you have folded everything precisely, they should be wrinkle- free when you unpack.  Make sure to fill every single little space in your carryon-on with small items.

Before you leave, make a photocopy of your passport and keep it in a separate place.  In the event you lose this precious document, you can present your copy to the passport agent at a U.S. Embassy or Consulate in whatever country you are visiting.

On board the plane, dress comfortably but elegantly. One never knows whom you may meet! Remember my constant refrain about the impact of a first impression? Crew members too, judge passengers by the way they are dressed.

A bientôt,

Michele
Michele Benza is San Francisco’s “Best Kept Secret”! She is the founder of “Michele Benza Image Consulting and Posture” and is a member of the Association of Image Consultants International (AICI). Michele is also the only American member of the Association Francaise pour L’image Professionnelle et Personnelle (AFIPP)!

You can work with Michele on-line or face-to-face. Call (415) 956-3025 or e-mail Michele for an appointment. You’ll be thrilled with the results! To learn more, please visit her website at MicheleBenza.

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How is it that they slide through school without even appearing to try?  Sometimes it looks like magic, the way a Gemini type* can finesse those multiple questions tests and even the essay tests and dazzle teachers with their knowledge. 

by Jamie Kahl
Astrologer

Here, in a smashing celebration of Gemini goodness, is how they do it . . .

1.  Love information.  It’s true that Gemini types are naturally drawn to facts, data and information.  I’m speaking now to you, Gemini Girl. 

You are most likely, of all the signs, to win at Trivial Pursuit and then to modestly proclaim that your knowledge is useless.  But you seek it anyway.  You can be enthralled—and persuaded—by statistics. 

Let’s face it:  ferreting out, ingesting, remembering and ultimately sharing information is beyond a hobby with you.  It’s a way of life.

2.  Grasp the surface concept quickly.   And then move on to the next idea.  Don’t linger too long or dig too deeply. 

Sure, there’s more there—there always is.  But you don’t need to get caught up in it.  The Gemini intelligence knows that the main idea is enough.  If you can grasp it, remember it, and produce it when you are asked, you can build a wealth of facts that are useful in an everyday way.  And you can pass tests.

3.  Engage other minds in conversation.  

Practice your ability to get ideas across to other minds (with other mental styles) and to hear their ideas.  Ask questions that put the attention on the other person.  Genuinely want to know the answers. 

It’s a paradox that half of looking smart is in making others look smart.  Don’t pay too much attention to whether you look smart because you probably do without trying.

4.  Be the dilettante you are.  Gemini, you are good at many things. 

You’re an excellent mimic.  You develop your own style by trying on the style of others.  You are a Renaissance woman—embrace it.  Enjoy it.  Gemini has a short attention span, but is this really a problem in the modern world?  More of a necessity, I’m thinking, because those who can’t think fast get left behind.  That very distractibility can be used to your advantage—keep it fresh, keep it light, keep your mind moving.

5.  Dwell in wonder.  Be endlessly curious.  To be Gemini is like having an eternal child-mind:  “What’s that?  And what’s that?” and the big one:  “Why??” 

Gemini wants to eat up life-experience with the brain.  For Gemini, life is a road made of questions.  When a Gemini thinks she has the answers, some part of her deeply curious, extremely mobile brain shuts off.  And that’s a shame, because this sign’s sense of wonder is immense and it’s a great gift to have and to share with others. 

So the next time you stop to absorb an interesting idea, instead of just filing it away, ask yourself a question about it.  Enjoy the mystery, even as you are penetrating it with your understanding.  Thanks, Gemini, for eating up information and then offering it to the rest of us in bite-sized pieces. 

Please consider this:

* You don’t have to be a Gemini to be a Gemini type.  That’s because you could be a Taurus (or any other sign) yet have a bunch of planets in your chart in Gemini—enough to tip the balance and leave you feeling more like Twins than Bull.

And if you’re not a Gemini or just curious to learn more about astrology, check out these articles on Taurus and Aries.

Read more about Gemini on Jamie’s Astrology and Personal Empowerment blog.

Jamie Kahl is a professional astrologer with 30 years of study and 18 years of practice in Berkeley, CA. She specializes in showing women the power of feminine archetypes in everyday life. She does readings for individuals, couples and families. She also teaches classes in person in Berkeley and online.

Jamie believes that every human being contains the seeds of greatness, and that your astrology chart is the finest shortcut to accessing it. Using your chart as the “owner’s manual for being you,” Jamie can help you have satisfying relationships, enjoy career success, discover your life purpose and navigate your path in ways tailored to work uniquely for you. Learn more at Pandora Astrology.

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by Syndi Seid,
Business Protocol and Etiquette Expert

Syndi Seid

The parade is one of the Top 10 parades in the world according to the  International Fesitval and Arts Association!  And it’s one of the few reamining night illumninated parades in the US.  Filled with pagentry and music it is a wonderful way to celebrate the Chinese New Year.

I love celebrating this holiday. And there are many ways that YOU too, can celebrate the Chinese New Year.  

Here are 8* ideas for you to do in the next week:

(*Curious, do you know why I chose to provide only 8 tips?  Why not 7 or 9, or 10 tips?  Learn the answer at the end of this article.)

1.  Clean your house from top to bottom before the New Year arrives.  It’s never too late to clean house. 

2.  Decorate your home with special paper greetings, flowers, and fruits. Tie greeting cards and good luck symbols on a blooming tree you can purchase or make one yourself. By having or placing an abundance of fragrant flowers and fruits on the tree, the luckier the family will be in the New Year. 

3.  Wear new clothes on the first day of the New Year.  Although the first day has past, to me, it’s never too late for a woman to wear new cloths to help signify the beginning of a new, clean and fresh year.

4.  Learn to say Happy New Year in Chinese or Vietnamese:  Kung Hei Fat Choy (Mandarin) or Gung Hay Fat Choy (Cantonese) Chuc Mung Nam Moi (Vietnamese, celebrating Tet)

5.  Enjoy a Chinese banquet.  Ideally in multiples of ten, this is a great holiday to invite friends to enjoy a Chinese banquet together.  It is still one of the most economical ways to host or share in a great meal together.  It is a time to renew friendships and love that is intended to last the entire year. 

6.  Give children good luck money.  Everyone becomes a year older with the New Year, no matter when your birthday actually occurs. Give children red envelopes called “Lai See” or a “Hong Bow” with “good luck” money inside. This tradition is also used for many other festive occasions, in lieu of modern gift-giving practices. 

7.  Call eight friends you haven’t connected with for some time to say hello.  In the Chinese culture the number 8 signifies good luck.  I hope these eight people and I will have good luck throughout the year.

8.  Attend one of the events:  In addition to the big parade being held on Saturday, 27 February 2010, check out all the other events taking place during this two week celebration!  You will find a complete schedule of all festivities at ChineseParade.com. 

Bonus: Give chopsticks a chance. Practice manipulating the oldest eating utensils in the world.  Here’s a brief video to help you practice.

*Why 8 tips:  The number 8 is a sign of good luck in the Asian culture. 

Here’s wishing you and yours a great year, filled with much prosperity, happiness, and good health!

Syndi Seid is a recognized authority on business protocol and etiquette.  A graduate of the prestigious Protocol School of Washington, in D.C. and the Emily Post Institute, Syndi earned their highest levels of certification, including Certified International Protocol Officer and Corporate Trainer.

Syndi has appeared on several national programs including ABC’s Good Morning America, CBS Eye on America and HGTV’s Party at Home.  She is the founder of Advanced Etiquette and trains and consults with major corporations, executives and business professionals to help them achieve confidence in any social situation anywhere in the world!  To learn more, please visit her website, AdvancedEtiquette.com.

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Diet and Healthy Eating

Darya Pino is a UCSF scientist, San Francisco foodie and advocate of local, seasonal foods.  Here are her favorite ways to eat healthy and manage your diet!

Darya Pino

1.  Keep a healthy snack like almonds or trail mix in your purse or car. It’s easy to justify eating unhealthy food when you don’t have any other options. Avoid these situations by always having a small stash of nuts or other non-perishable snack to tide you over until you can find real food. The best snacks contain protein and fat, but no added sugars.

2.  Eat slowly and mindfully.  No matter how little time you have, sitting down and being fully present when you eat is worth the investment. Mindful eating helps you better appreciate and feel more satisfied with your food. As a result you will eat less and feel better!

3.  Grab quick meals at health food and grocery stores rather than the drive thru.  If you’re in a bind and need a quick meal, look for alternatives to the drive-thru. Health food and grocery stores like Whole Foods have wonderful prepared food sections where you can find fresh and healthy meals to go.

4.  Avoid “low fat” foods.  Old habits die hard, and low fat is one of the hardest to kill. Foods advertised as low fat are usually the least healthy choice, since the fat is often replaced with extra salt and sugar. Enjoy the fat and choose smaller portions instead, you will actually feel more satisfied.

For more of Darya’s healthy eating tips visit her blog Summer Tomato or see her work at The Huffington Post. You can also connect with Darya on Twitter @summertomato and Facebook.

Making Fitness Fit

Jennifer Ruiz M.S. and Jaclyn Ruiz are sisters and the Co-founders of BeFitnPretty.com.  They share their favorite ways to make fitness fit into your day!

Jaclyn and Jen Ruiz

Park and Walk: One super simple way to fit exercise into your everyday life is to park your car in the spot furthest from the entrance the mall/grocery store/your office. Those extra steps can really add up over the course of a week, month and year.  Plus, you will avoid all of the stress that comes from trying to find a parking spot close to the door.

Stairs for Your Stems: Stair climbing is a fantastic way to tone up your legs and backside, so shun elevators and escalators and instead vow to take the stairs whenever possible. You will be shocked at how many opportunities you have to fit in a quick stair workout and your legs and behind will have never looked better!

Dress for Success: If you know you want to hit the gym or go on a run the next morning, pack up your gym bag or lay your clothes out the night before.  You are less likely to skip a your workout if you see your lonely clothes sitting there and staring at you from across the room.

Rock Out while You Workout: Good music can be just the thing you need to get yourself off the couch and out the door. Pack your mp3 player with upbeat tunes that you know will get you moving. And if you are feeling particularly unmotivated, crank up the music in your house and dance around for a while, it’s an instant dance workout!

BeFitNPretty is a website dedicated to helping busy girls everywhere take the “die” out of their diet, by sharing the prettiest and most sane ways to stay fit and healthy. Jennifer and Jaclyn are both Bay Area natives.  On the weekends they can be found running in Golden Gate Park or visiting one of the many amazing farmers markets the area has to offer. You can also connect with them on Twitter @BeFitNPretty.

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What are your favorite ways to make the holidays memorable and stress free?

Carolyn Kellams

The holidays are a magical time! I decorate, entertain, go to parties, and have a merry season. Years ago I stopped buying presents for adults (but still give gifts to children). When I told my friends I was not exchanging presents, I encouraged us to develop traditions where we DID something fun together.

To be honest, I don’t want to receive a gift I don’t want, nor give one to someone who has everything. Not buying gifts is a huge relief. And, having holiday adventures is fun! I’m a single person.

Five years ago, after continuous social events and weight gain beginning at Thanksgiving, I decided to stay home on Christmas day. At first, friends didn’t understand my new tradition. Christmas is my day.

I have a roaring fire, my cat Mango and I are curled up on the sofa and I watch movies. Dinner is fresh crab, sourdough bread, a delicious salad, chocolate dessert and Champaign. It’s my Merry Christmas!

Carolyn Kellams is a Life Coach and teaches Stress and Time Management workshops. She also tries to practice what she preaches!

Lorena Bathey

Holidays can be filled with immense emotion and frustration.  At this time of year your shortcomings can be amplified.  Not in a relationship?  What’s wrong with you?  Don’t have enough money for gifts?  Why don’t you have a better job?  

I challenge you to look at this holiday season as a time to gift yourself. 

Buy a tree that YOU like and put your favorite ornaments on it.  Create a dinner party to celebrate with your favorite dishes and people.  Or celebrate your holidays lying on a beach because you have always wanted to. 

This year do NOT make resolutions, instead make gifts to yourself to do the things that you have put off.  Stress comes when you try to live your life in ways you do not feel comfortable doing. 

So put a bow on YOUR life and determine what YOU want for your holiday…..then live that all year long.

Lorena Bathey is an author, speaker, and motivator for Fairy Godmothers everywhere.  Her book, Happy Beginnings: How I Became My Own Fairy Godmother  was her catalyst to teaching women how to create their own real life fairy tales. 

Ann Gilbert

Each year, we add an ornament for our tree.  This year the kids will pick their own.  Remembering the past years selection is a fun tradition.

 I love giving holiday gifts.  I ask myself, what do I love about this person?  What do they talk about?  What preoccupies them?  I want to give a gift that says, “I really know you.”

We often travel to my mother-in-laws for the holidays.  Last year, after complaining to a friend, I made a list of the things I would do better.  Here is what I wrote;

- Call my mom/sisters more while away.

- Stay hydrated.  (Drink the good wine the week before!)

- Bring a good book and my music for my personal cheer.

- Schedule a massage. (flight with kids; brutal)

 At holiday parties my favorite question is, “Now that the year is ending, what did you do or learn this year?”

Ann Gilbert, a Personal and Business Coach, helps people relate with each other and themselves through effective personal strategies.   Ann is also the Mom of twin sons. 

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By Kathi O’Leary, SF Bay Area Photographer

Kathi O'Leary

Creating photos with appeal and power is a process and a journey. As a San Francisco Bay Area photographer and teacher, I’d like to share a few of my favorite pointers that will help you take memorable holiday photos!

1. Where Should You Point Your Camera?

You can photograph anything that has enough light for the camera to record a picture (point and shoot!).  But will that photograph be attractive to look at or represent the moment you are trying to catch?

The composition of this photo demonstrates the impact of repeat elements.

Keep in mind that certain general shapes and tones tend to make good photos. We are drawn to repeats like a row of columns, or picket fences. And in the two dimensional photographic print there is pleasure in seeing deep color, separation of tones, or objects with patina like rust and bark.

For subject matter, it is eye catching to show well-isolated people or animals, flowers, or simple tools that allude to human activity like coffee cups, dinner plates, a pile of coats or shoes left outside a door.

2. Frame Your Photo!

Remember that filling your photo rectangle is just as demanding as filling a canvas with paint. Fit all the interesting things inside the rectangle and exclude that which is not part of your artistic statement.

An oil painter would not paint a rose in a pot, and then add a Fed Ex truck in the background to help the composition. But, when photographing in the real world…we all know…life happens. Delivery trucks lurk around every corner and sign posts seem to grow out of people’s heads like mushrooms after a rain shower!

Pay as much attention to your background as to your subject!

3.  Consider Your Compositional Choices.

This photo pays as much attention to the background as to the subject!

You can shoot off-center, climb up on a chair and shoot aerial, lie down on your back and shoot upwards, shoot in a sepia color setting, position your subject next to something that emphasizes the moment etc.

The point here is that… composing is not static, it’s kinetic; you’ve got to move! Get on your knees, hop on a chair. Move the subject into different lighting conditions.

And finally that one thing that makes all the difference!

4. The Grand Daddy of all Compositional Tips, Shoot at “The Decisive Moment”!

This refers to scenes that are very familiar during the holidays…moving objects!  Kids and pets scurrying through the house, food going in the oven or out of the oven, family and friends talking and moving about!

Waiting for a moving subject to come clearly into your composition, is the mark of a patient, confident photographer. It takes persistence and luck too.  But like the lotto, you’ve got to play to win, so get that camera and start creating your own perfect photos this holiday season. 

A few minutes of your time and effort will create lasting memories and joy for a lifetime!Kathi O’Leary has been capturing eye catching portraits of families and professionals in the San Francisco Bay Area for 14 years. She teaches digital photography to individuals and groups, holds workshops for kids during school and summer breaks, hosts Picture Parties in her studio and conducts walking photography tours of San Francisco. To learn more please visit her website; KathiOLeary.com.

If you enjoyed this article please help us spread the word about the SF Bay Area Women’s Journal!  You can e-mail, Tweet or Bookmark it by clicking the Share/Save button!

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Girlfriends are there to listen, to console and to encourage. They inspire us to keep on keeping on or help us to look at things in a new way.

In this edition of

The Grace of Girlfriends, we asked  three Bay Area women the following question:

“How do you make time for self-nurturing and what are your favorite ways to take care of yourself?”

Here’s what they had to say:

Jodi Perelman

One of the ways I take care of myself is to surround myself with people who also believe in the power of self-nurturing and self-care. These friends support me in making good choices and look out for me when I overextend myself.

Another good way is to set aside time for nurturing activities (or non-activities!). It’s really helpful to make an appointment with myself for things like rest, making art, meditation, yoga, seeing good friends, connecting with my partner and doing absolutely nothing.

It can be hard to slow down in the midst of so much busyness, and sometimes I feel a lot of resistance to it. But when I actively make self-care and self-nurturing my priority, I feel good inside and am more effective in my other activities.

Jodi Perelman, M.A., is a psychotherapist in private practice in San Francisco. She welcomes women who wish to work on relationship issues and build on their innate capacity for health and healing. She also works with couples and families.

Erica Nelson

Nurturing yourself is a mindset, a way of being that honors you. So often we slip into the role of leaving our own list of nurturing activities to last place.

The funny thing is that while I personally know nurturing oneself is wildly important (and I even wrote a book about getting into a positive mindset and how this will help you get stronger results), in my life, taking time for Erica is a challenge. The three kids are perpetually mommy-hungry, my future books want my energy, housework stretches on endlessly, and my husband would like more time.

To take care of my spirit, I meditate and listen to guided meditations. I love riding my horse. I curl up with a book in front of the fireplace. In the wild landscape of my life, if I cannot spend the time for a nice pedicure, I stop and look outside and consider the beauty in the sky.

To the degree I take that time for me, my life runs smoothly and with more joy.

Erica M Nelson, author of “Prospect When You Are Happy: Move the Law of Attraction into Action” is a success coach.

Nikki Anderson

I make time for self-nurturing by choosing me over other things I could be doing.   I have realized over the years that if I don’t put myself as a priority then ultimately not only do I suffer but so does everything else in my life. 

My favorite ways to take care of myself each day are taking quiet time in the mornings, sitting down for three balanced meals every day, and taking as many naps as I can squeeze in on a given week. 

Nikki Anderson is a lifestyle strategist and business coach.  She works with individuals, teams and business partners, helping them to create successful work/life balance strategies.

 Now it’s your turn!  How do you find time for yourself and what are some of your favorite ways to nurture yourself?

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by Kathi O’Leary

Kathi O'Leary Photographer

Even the most amateur photographers can achieve a “professional” look, provided they adapt to the specific features of digital.

Digital is Not Only More Fun, It Costs Less Too!

Before reviewing the technical advantages, let’s look at the financial incentives to switch to digital. With cheaper manufacturing costs, $250 will get you a point-and-shoot with fine workmanship and features that used to cost $500. As attractive as that initial investment is, an even bigger savings can be realized in the ongoing costs of taking photos.

For example, shooting ten rolls of 36-exposure film on vacation can add up to $200 once developing and printing are complete.  After tossing poorly lit or out-of-focus photos, perhaps only 200 are worth saving, making the true cost about one dollar per image.

The Media Card Creates Digital Magic

A digital photo taken by a young student in Kathi O'Leary's Workshop for Kids!

Media cards, each no bigger than a matchbook, have replaced a bulky stock of films.  And once purchased, you use the media card over and over again.  Other advantages  include photo backup, photo e-mailing and the absence of cumbersome negatives. 

With the revolutionary addition of viewing monitors, pre-visualization has become one of the most compelling reasons to go digital. Photographers have immediate “insight” into the quality of exposure and composition.  Correcting your photography on-the-spot makes bringing home winning pictures more the norm than the exception.   

Here are some professional tips I give my digital photography students:

1.  Start by setting the sensitivity to 100 ISO which reduces the amount of grain.

2.  Adjust for the most pixels possible, often called “best” or Large.

3.  Pick the best quality so there is very little shrinking of the pixel information; it takes more space on your media card, but it’s worth it.

4.  If you have an aperture setting, set it to the smallest number like f2.8 or f4.0. This lets in a lot of light, and makes backgrounds soft and out of focus, to add emphasis to your “in-focus” subject.

5.  Use the no-flash setting.  This saves battery (rechargeable ones are best) and gives a more realistic photo.

6.  You must pre-focus by softly pressing the shutter half way down, while waiting for the focus and metering indicator to come on. Don’t let go of the shutter position!

Now you’re ready to take that perfect photo!  Just gently, firmly push the shutter further down without jiggling the camera.

Do check the results in the monitor as you go. Voila! You should see a detailed, focused, well-lit photo.

If not, recompose, focus again and shoot as many as you like and adjust your angle and zoom lens while you’re at it. It doesn’t cost a thing to shoot and shoot until you get it right!

Kathi O’Leary has been capturing eye catching portraits of families and professionals in the San Francisco Bay Area for 14 years. She regularly teaches digital photography to individuals and groups and holds weeklong workshops for kids during school and summer breaks. To learn more please visit her website; KathiOLeary.com.

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