How to Improve Your Relationships in the New Year!

Improve Your Relationships in the New Year

The new year is a good time to take a look at our closest relationships and see what if any changes we want to make. Many of us have a desire to develop more fulfilling relationships, and this time spent reflecting can help set changes into motion.

by Jodi Perelman, M.F.T.

Jodi Perelman

Relationship Inventory

A quick and easy way to get your wheels turning is to use a relationship inventory. I recommend setting aside 10-20 minutes, someplace quiet and cozy, and going over the following questions. You can write or journal your answers, or simply think about them.

Or you can spice it up and do this as a joint exercise with a friend. This will probably take longer, but a good cup of coffee or tea and comments from your friend may make the process more valuable to you.

Quick and Easy Questions to Spark Your Thinking

I. Relationships with Friends and Family

• Which friendships have felt most alive to you this year? Who do you look forward to seeing and spending time with?

• What if anything would you like to see change in your relationships with family? Do you fall into any familiar patterns when you’re with family?

II. Relationships with a Partner

• What is true about your romantic relationship/s this past year?

• What if anything would you like to be different in the next year and how do you imagine getting there?

• If you’re dating or in a relationship, how interested is your partner in similar kinds of growth or change?

III. Relationship with Yourself

• How have you treated yourself this year? Are there any areas you would like to make changes (such as exercise/movement, food/drink, your inner voice)?

• How will you know when these changes have been accomplished?

• Name a few of your aspirations, without worrying how you will accomplish them. What would bring you happiness this year?

• What scares you about attempting these changes?

Nice work! If you like, you can set a date to visit your inventory during the year and see how any of your answers have changed. I wish you well in the New Year.

Jodi Perelman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist with a private practice in San Francisco. She earned her Masters degree in Counseling Psychology from the California Institute of Integral Studies and participates in advanced training and education programs.

She believes that therapy presents a special opportunity to understand yourself more deeply and make any changes that are important to you. Jodi works with adults and young people on areas including relationship issues, anxiety and depression, and healing from loss. She can be reached at JodiPerelman.com.

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