What does Life Wisdom have to do with Your Sexuality?
Katherine Forsythe
What has shaped your womanhood? Have you wondered why you think dramatically differently than your best friend (or even your own daughter!) about behavior, values, dress, and attitude towards men?
by Katherine Forsythe, MSW
Sexuality & Intimacy Educator
How Can She Think That?
Have you thought, “how can she say/do/think that?” It’s all about the “how to be a woman” lessons you gathered (or that she missed) from your years on this planet.
Last month, we started a series about the Wheel of Sexuality - 6 wedges in a wheel that contribute to how we play out our lives as women. By the way, the term sexuality is an umbrella term over all 6 unique wedges, or categories for articulating our womanhood.
Physical sex is just one wedge. Every woman has 5 more! The Wheel of Sexuality gives us a format for honoring and celebrating all aspects of our sexual self.
Life Wisdom and Your Sexuality
This month we examine the 1st wedge of the Wheel, Our life wisdom, the basis of who we are … our foundation … and that’s not the old fashioned name for tinted moisturizer! Our foundation erupts out of past experiences specifically as women – some wonderful, some not so fantastic. Those events sculpt our individuality today, and our preferences for how we each want to express ourselves as women.
Know this: there is no right or wrong way to behave as women, in spite of what Cosmo might tell us!
You lived through some amazing historical events – and you formed an opinion about womanly conduct that sits indelibly sketched on your brain. Consider: How did you interpret Monica Lewinsky’s behavior with President Clinton? What did your church or neighborhood chatter tell you about the values? How did Sarah Palin’s attitude about pregnancy and her daughter in the last election affect you?
Always Put a Newspaper on the Guy’s Lap!
You had personal life events that either have given you pause in relationships, or have freed you to be intimately adventurous. To illustrate, at a young age, many women were witness to a man’s exposing himself against her will (not talked about, but sadly a frequent and unfortunate event). On the other hand, you may have had a first sexual experience with a gentle kind passionate guy who cared deeply about your satisfaction and happiness.
One woman I know was told by consecutive teenage boyfriends that she was too fat. Today she is stunningly attractive, and, yes, sees herself as heavy and unworthy. Conversely, another friend carries herself beautifully in her larger frame, in part because she had grandparents who told her continually how lovely she was – inside and out.
Your womanly life wisdom was also influenced by ethnic/cultural influences, spirituality and/or religion, your own personality, the friendships you made with the opposite sex, experiences (good and bad) with former partners, even the formal sex education you may or may not have had.
I have a friend who was told by a Nun that she must always put a newspaper on the boy’s lap before she accepted his invitation to sit there – otherwise, instant pregnancy! It took her years to get past how absurd those instructions were, because they came from a respected authority figure.
Add it all up, and you are dramatically different from every other woman on the planet. Honor the extraordinary sexuality that your own distinctive life wisdom has bestowed upon you.
Next month, we will look at Intimacy.
Sharing is caring…so if you enjoyed this article be sure to share it!
Category: Sex & Love
About the Author (Author Profile)
Katherine A. Forsythe, MSW is an expert in human sexuality, intimacy, and relationships. Her passion is to invigorate sexuality and intimacy. She work with clients privately – both in her office and by phone, presents keynotes, provides workshops, and appears regularly on radio and television. Her new book: Sexperienced: Guide for the Seasoned Woman Seeking New Possibilities will be released in April.
To learn more please visit her website, GetaSecondWind.com. If you have a question or would like to contact Katherine send her an e-mail or call her at (415) 702-9544. All inquires are strictly confidential! Be sure to mention the SF Bay Area Woman’s Journal, and receive 25% discount on your first session!
Subscribe
If you enjoyed this article, subscribe to receive more just like it.
[...] and celebrating our unique and individual expression of our womanhood. Last month, we examined how life wisdom contributes to our [...]
[...] for honoring and celebrating our individual and unique expression of sexuality. The first wedge was Life Wisdom and last month we examined Intimacy. In this article, we go a little deeper, into Sensuality. [...]
[...] far, we’ve talked about Life Wisdom, Intimacy, and Sensuality. At the end of this series, we will have examined 6 wedges that allow [...]
[...] dilemma, and how to talk to your doctor about it. In the past several months, we’ve talked about Life Wisdom, Intimacy, Sensuality, and Physical Sexual Expression (the actual act of sex). At the end of this [...]
[...] that allow us to celebrate our individual sexual expression – who we are as a woman; Life Wisdom, Intimacy, Sensuality, Physical Sexual Expression, and last month Reproductive Health. This month, [...]